First of all apologies for such a long delay in posting and airing my dented skewed opinions. I was reminded by a fervent reader if the blog had gone into Sleeping Beauty mode like the last posting. No it hasn't.
It's been two weeks since the Sri Lanka and Singapore holiday and so I have decided to share my experience of Far East hospitality.
Before launching into virtual ramblings, I would like to fervently discourage anyone from ever flying with Sri Lanka airlines (An official complaint has been filed requesting for a full refund as I type).
It is a sub standard airline severely lacking in time managerial skills with ill equipped air crew who find it a problem doing elementary tasks such as serving ice with lukewarm drinks.
There is barely enough leg room space for a two feet tall toddler.The gaudy and cheap blankets we were given had seen better days. So faded was it beyond recognition once could barely tell it's original colour
After ordering a low fat diet weeks before I boarded my flight, I was told by one of the air crew only Lamb Curry was available. Extremely tired and hungry from the 4hour delay we had encountered at LHR, I acquiesced. The meal was unpalatable, bland and plain unappetising. The bread roll served had not been warmed and it smelt mouldy. I immediately sent it back after managing a spoonful, determined to travel the remainder of the 16hour flight hungry than to torture my fine palates with such unattractive food.
As mentioned, the flight had been delayed by a good 4hours at London Heathrow. This resulted in transit passengers missing their connecting flights so we had to spend a night in Colombo.
On arrival at the airport, there was no staff from Sri Lanka airlines to direct us unto our next course of action. We milled around the airport like forgotten lost causes for about half an hour as the few we approached spoke no English. Eventually, we found the Sri Lankan help desk nestled into a tight corner with no sign attached to it saying 'Sri Lanka'. I managed to spot it after recognising the airline staff uniform. And so commences my Day 1 of Far East Hospitality.
Day 1:
Sri Lanka
Nothing runs on time. Queuing? What's that? This isn't England where people queue for their own funeral.
The Passengers in transit form an orderly queue by the Sri Lankan help desk patiently waiting our turn to be directed. Suddenly there is an influx of Thawb wearing men who rush to cut at the front of the queue. One particularly overweight boy starts waving his hands and shouting in a deep raspy voice. No doubt the rolls of fat obviously obstructing his vocal cords.
All around us everyone looks on unfazed. In this blistering heat of 40 °C no one seems to be taking any notice these Thawb wearing group are about to do the unforgivable Bristish crime: jump the queue!
As if they read my mind, the English lad infront of me starts shouting in a loud cockney accent:
" Whadda ya think ya doing mate! There's a queue ya got to follow mate! Get to the back!"
He was joined in chorus by a hippie lesbian looking American lady wearing garb clothing who spoke softly but sharply in a voice that almost sounded like a shriek.
"Get back!" She screeched. "There's a queue you have to follow guys! Get back!".
There ensued a small fracas as the Thawb wearing men refused to budge amidst the cries of tourists who reprimanded them for daring to jump a queue. In the end, Sri Lankan air line staff refused to acknowledge the queue jumping criminals in favour of serving the orderly tourists.
After spending three hours at the Bandarainake airport, we were eventually shuttled to our transit hotels.
Arriving at the Catamaran Beach Hotel- Negombo was another wait as our rooms were not ready. We were encouraged to eat the buffet lunch presented to us. Seeing a fly buzzing around the room with it's determinant path headed towards the buffet, I decided against eating.
At this point I was tired, hot and exhausted and just wanted to sleep. The others made a headline towards the buffet surprised at my refusal to eat. Of course no one else will notice a fly buzzing around food...except me and my eagle eyes.
Refusing to wait any any second more given that my eyes were heavy from lack of proper sleep in over 18 hours, I asked to be shown a room immediately. The request was immediately granted. An eager hotel attendant with a poster boy smile rushed to grab my bags and take me to my room. On our way, he launched into conversation:
"You from Ameyica?" he asked in a heavy Sri Lankan accent with a wide friendly grin showing gap teeth.
"No," came the reply. I am from Cameroon". I wait for the mundane " Where's that" rhetoric question to follow suite. Not this time around. My interviewer had other plans.
"Still Ameyica noh?" he insists.
"No." I say again. Cameroon is in West Africa. That's miles away from America."
He pauses, looking bemused, perplexed, dazed and bewildered. Then after what seems like an eternity, he nods his head and still asks:
"That part that is Ameyica yes?"
I guess this is what you call American citizenship by coercion.
We finally arrive my room. Thankfully it is spacious, clean, air conditioned and smells of fresh linen. I tip the attendant and he leaves.
Before leaving Colombo, I manged to catch some sightseeing with the others. On our way to Negombo beach, I meet a Nigerian (what is that about 1 in every 4 earth inhabitants being a Nigerian? Even on the inhabitable planet Mars I am sure there exists a little colony of Nigerians). He comes over to greet me and proudly tells me the streets on which I walk were built by my fellow Cameroonians.
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| Rickshaws: mode of transport. These streets were built by Cameroonians |
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| Negombo Beach Sri Lankan style: Swimsuits...what's that? |
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| Negombo Beach entrance |
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| British influence in every corner of the world |
Day 2:
Singapore
In which black people can not come from London (And I thought Americans were narrow minded). I visit the Mosque for prayers.
Needless to say I was happy to finally arrive civilisation! I quickly located the taxi arranged by the hotel as he had my name written in sprawling bold letters. As I nestled into the back of the comfortable seats and air conditioned taxi, I was able to breathe a sigh of relief mingled with contentment. Alack! 'Tis were to last for a minute as the taxi driver plunged into a set of questions.
"Did you travel from Afika?" He asks in distinctive Chinese patois. Not again! I screamed inside.
" No. I travelled from London" I replied . His next question took me off balance. In my lifetime, I have met a lot of people whose mindsets are as narrow as a dinghy North London alleyway. However I must admit this Singapore cab driver beat all the others to grab the coveted prize for The Most Narrow Minded Pea Sized Brain Fellow on Earth.
" How comes you from London!" He exclaimed in utter amazement. Your skin black!" He says this and taps on his arm repeatedly to probably emphasise my blackness.
I decided not to lecture a Singapore cab driver on diversity. It's too hot and I am in tourist mood. How on earth does one go about correcting this level of unclassifiable stupidity?
After the hotel check in, I head straight for
the world famous Orchard Road. There are two
main activities Singaporeans engage in; eating and shopping. This was
highlighted in the rows upon rows of shops and delicious eateries to suit every
budget on Orchard Road. Every MRT(tube station) in Singapore is a shopping mall. I felt
awfully out of place in my colourful flower patterned red and white boob tube
maxi dress as all around me were neatly dressed chic ladies in expensive
understated well cut dresses tottering on heels. You know how the Japanese
ladies who shop from Selfridges et al look like on Oxford street? Dressed to
the nines as if they had a lunch date at Mr Chow.
Orchard Road quickly lost it's charm as it bore a startling reminder to Oxford street. The shops were similar as I even saw M&S. Most importantly given my curvy size 12 frame, I was no match for the petite sizes which adorned the shops. I mean being a size 10 out here is fat so a size 12 is practically towing the obese line.
I headed back to the hotel to catch up with my friend Aishah; a lovely local. We went to explore another famous hub: Arab Street ( Think Edgware Road but with a friendlier less secluded bunch). I even ventured into the famed Masjid Sultan Mosque for prayers and passed of as a Muslim. It was my first time in a Mosque and I was terribly excited. The Muslims gathered for prayers were friendly and extremely welcoming. I greeted most with the Arabic "As-Salamu-Alaykum" learnt during my childhood days in the religious welcoming Cameroon where I had grown up amongst Muslim neighbours.
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| Inside the Masjid Sultan |
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| Arab Street fineries |
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| An exited shop owner asked for his picture to be taken |
We ended the evening in Bugis Street where I got my taste of outdoor dining...a traditional hallmark of Singapore.
An open style buffet was present and Aishah picked out some delicious traditional Malay food. In no time a large plate was served with an array of beautifully assorted cooked foods and sauces. Another local delight- Green tea drink accompanied the meal. I wasted no time tucking in. All around us people engaged in similar activities; eating, drinking and laughing well into the late night. It was impossible to believe it was nearing midnight given the packed filled streets.
Day 2:
Singapore Dukw Tour and Night Safari
Singapore City is a highly urbanised small Island which can be toured in three days. A must do for tourists is the Singapore Dukw Tour which takes you around major attractions in about an hour.The tour takes place both on land and in water; on the famous Singapore River. A tour guide is on hand to talk through about the major landmarks. However it is near impossible to understand the guides amongst the noisy hum drum of the Dukw Tour explorer. So its best to read about any landmarks before taking the tour.
According to the Singapore City tour, the Captain Dukw explorer vehicle is 'a revamped Vietnam war era vehicle'.
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| View from the Dukw tour along the Singapore River |
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| Captian Dukw tour explorer vehicle |
The Dukw Tour picks tourists from their hotel and it was a pleasant ride. Unfortunately the world famous Merlion was having reconstructive surgery after having been struck down several times from lightening. As such, he was partly covered while surgeons did some behind the scenes work. Nevertheless he managed to take some time off from his re-constructive surgery wishing us tourists a Happy Holiday.
The Dukw tour office is located in the Singapore Flyer. So immediately after the spectacular land and sea experience, it was time to experience Asia's biggest wheel; the Singapore Flyer.
With it's majestic presence which dominates the Singapore skyline at almost every angle (just like the Marina Bay sands hotel) it stands a whooping 165m tall( that's 42 stories high) considerably dwarfing the London Eye's 135m.
The ride offered breathtaking stunning views of Singapore.
The photos below are of the impressive views from the ride on the Singapore Flyover.
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| The Marina Bay Sands hotel |
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| The Esplanade theatre |
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| The Marina bay Gardens (the vertical structures) |
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| The Science Museum (Cauliflower shape structure)The floating staidum (tennis court like structure) |
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| Executive flats mainly inhabited by expatriates |
The day ended with a trip to the Night Safari. This is a must see tourist attraction. Located on the far end of town, you come face to face with real wild life animals as you board a jungle tram. Spectacular animal shows filled with fireworks take place at various times throughout the evening. Unfortunately after arriving late, we missed this show. A few pictures capture the brilliance and enchantment of the Night Safari.
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| Toilet 'jungle style' |
Day Three:
Foot tour of major landmarks. A paparazzi moment on the train.
Halfway through the holiday, this called for a walkabout within the city centre visiting touristic areas such as Esplanade park, Merlion Park, Raffles Hotel, statue of Sir Stamford Raffles (the founder of Singapore), Houses of Parliament, City Hall, Istana( Presidential residence), etc
Taking the MRT (underground) I was distinctively aware of stares from almost everyone. Aishah pointed out being black was a bit of a novelty in Singapore as there were very few of us around town. Matt also said the same thing. As a kid his family found it cheaper holidaying in Singapore than visiting Sydney from his native Perth. So the stares were a mixture of curiosity and awe I suppose. Whilst travelling in the spacious clean air conditioned MRT (a far cry from the overcrowded London underground whose air was often pungent with stale sweat and body odour), an Indian man fervently starts taking pictures of me. Alarmed, I hide my face with my huge bag.
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| Houses of Parliament |
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| Istana. The furthest we could get |
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| A snippet view of Singapore's exceptionally clean underground transportation |
Day Four:
China Town. An encounter with a Malay Chinese palm reader. A Korean Mama tells me I am sexy.
In my previous life I hailed from the Royal Family. Unfortunately bad people from the North kidnapped us all stealing all our gold, wealth and precious metals. Hence I found myself in this non blue blooded life of mine. I must never dwell in the North. I must make a home always in the South and avoid fatty foods as in my 40s, I am destined to have heart failure.(Excerpts from a Chinese/Malay palm reader on streets of China Town-This explains why I always have that feeling of deja vu when visiting sumptuous places).
He even goes as far as scolding me for straightening my hair warning me my type must only keep the "curly type of hair".
"Very sexy." says the Korean Mama to me.
"Why thank you!"I exclaim giving a little bow.
"Sexy" she repeats again. This time she pats my heavy backside and runs her hand down the full length of my left body. I was too shocked to say anything. Her daughter giggles. No -one else is taking any notice...except me of course.
Visits were made to the Buddha tooth relic temple were I got just in time to join the monk for prayers. However before going in, I was politely asked by one of the guards to tie a sarong as my dress was too short. Out of respect for the temple and Buddha, could I kindly cover up? Flocks of tourists in skimpy attire, tight hot pants and vest tops were all asked to do same. A rather eager Indian on crutches hobbles up to me to ask for a picture.
"Why?" I asked rather puzzled.
"Just want to." He replies smiling broadly in a heavy Indian accent. His pearly white teeth makes a beautiful contrast against his ebony dark skin. I politely refuse.
At the Sri Layan Sithi Vinayagar Temple, a traditional Hindu ceremony was taken place which was a great delight to watch.
I discover sugar cane juice and in this sweltering heat of above 40 °C , have a few glasses.
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| Sri Layan temple |
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| Buddha Tooth Relic temple |
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| Monks reciting prayers |
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| Sugar cane juice |
In the evening, we head for the city center visiting Marina Bay, Boat Quay and Raffles Quay.
Singapore by night was an amazing experience with it's astonishing views. Midnight sees us at Lau Pa Sat; a historical Singapore market serving a vast array of food. Crab meat, satay,snails, etc The aroma of griiled and roasted food filled the air as hungry diners packed the place full even at such an ungodly hour.
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| Sir Stamford Raffles, founder of Singapore |
Day 5:
Little India. More Stares. More Questions. Sentosa Island
"Where you from?" asks the Chinese lady next to me on the MRT.
"Cameroon," I reply. She pauses for a moment contemplating on my answer. Her forehead lined in neat creased burrows in deep thought. (I think to myself like you ever heard of it).
Meanwhile Matt whispers:
"Why don't you just tell them you're from London? Makes it easier!"
"No way!" I reply. I am from Cameroon. It will broaden their sense of Geography just for one minute."
As suspected, the Chinese lady had never heard of Cameroon. I draw a map of Africa and point to it. Her eyes lit up and she nods her head exclaiming:
"Ah! Afika!"
Yes I say. "AFRICA"...with a heavy drawl on the "r". We both smile. Mission accomplished.
Little India as the name implies, is really little. However it is an important part of Singapore's multicultural society. The fantastic structures which Singapore is known for were built by Indian immigrants. Singaporeans don't do building work. They are all high city flyers who work in banks and firms across the cities. Indians are as vital to the Singapore economy the same way the Polish are to the UK economy. Indian immigrants built Singapore and are still building Singapore. So when next you see a magnificent sky high building dominating the Singaporean skies, spare a thought to the Indian immigrant; the corner stone on which Singapore is built on.
As I peruse the shops, I could have been in Southall or Ilford (Only the streets here are a lot cleaner and people more friendly). I am a bit annoyed searching for Bindis as the shopkeeper literally hovers over me. One thing I have picked up on this trip is people intrude a lot on your personal space. From queueing for tickets to just about anything, you can almost feel the breath of the next person down your back as they are standing particularly so close to you.
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| Council flats (HBD)Singapore style |
A visit to Singapore is incomplete without visiting Sentosa Island; Asia's biggest holiday resort. The island is impossible to tour in a day. There are a multitude of activities to do in Sentosa. Most however are geared towards family with young children. Think of it as a much more exaggerated Disney world. I had been warned not swim in the beaches as everything was man made hence the waters quite murky and not exactly sea fresh. Well for starters, I can't swim.
We visited the aquarium with it's enchanting views and saw baby sharks. Sadly we missed the Dolphin show. Then it was off to catch Songs of the Sea; a spectacularly created 3D musical production.
Sentosa Island is so huge there are inter bus services ferrying tourists between the different locations.
Day Six
Farewell Singapore!
